I’m BACK!!!! Been in a slump the last week or so and aside from projects for clients I just couldn’t write a thing! Put me way behind in a couple of my classes but this morning I got right to it and turned in a few things getting me back on my way. It’s the race to the finish line and I was seriously dragging my feet but I’m ready to make this final push now. I don’t know if its the events of the past several months or senioritis but I was seriously struggling to even attempt any of the assignments I just felt this internal resistance and it was overwhelming but I’ve broken through. Gonna spend the next few days banging this thing out and will be done with the Masters once and for all.
People I tell about school I think are more excited about it than I am. I honestly just want to be done with chapter in my life so I can move on. I don’t care to go to any ceremonies, parties, or banquets and when I get the certificate it will go in a seldom used drawer along with the other certificate. I’ve never really been one to subscribe to “appropriate” emotions. I was actually more excited today when I saw a shot of my cousin being filmed for an interview about his catering company than I am about being an advanced degree holder. Big whoop. I know I let my mom down with my lack of enthusiasm but I honestly am in no mood to celebrate.
I’m grateful for the many gifts I have in my life- family, friends, health, and stability. But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still simmering from the way this process has gone. People have said to me “get over it, don’t be angry, let it go” and they’re right. It’s generally unhealthy to hold a grudge if it consumes you. But the proverbial chip on my shoulder has been the motivation I’ve had to accomplish significant feats in my life. Being angry at those who saw me as a nerd, nobody, or know it all has propelled me to heights I may not otherwise have reached.
This period in my life has forever changed me but for the better. I have renewed passion to succeed and triumph over my enemies. The best revenge is succeeding where those tried to sabotage you and I will. I’ll save my celebrations for then. Moving on, so my workout quest continues and this morning I attempted a tough and lofty endeavor known as the 500 workout. No, it’s not a revised Spartan exercise it consists of 100 reps of five different body weight exercises.
I had been planning this workout for a number of weeks having successfully completed another challenge and after a hearty breakfast set off to the bars. It was as tough as I imagined and tougher. I completed the squats with little relative difficulty but I don’t know that I’ve ever attempted 100 pull ups in a single setting much less as part of a larger more complex workout. Toward the end of the pull ups I began to feel a bit nauseous which made me nervous because its a familiar feeling I’ve had while training that in the past has preceded fainting.
“How could this be happening?” I thought. “I did everything right, I ate, hydrated, and warmed up.” With this reasoning in mind I continued on my workout until I felt worse and decided to sit. My stomach was NOT happy with me and it was beginning to feel hot. I knew I had to do something as not to pass out. I thought about calling for help but quickly reconsidered as that didn’t work out so well last time. I managed to make it to a bench where I laid down and tried to wait it out. It was taking FOREVER and got worse before it got better, scary!
I thought about calling an Uber as I was on foot but decided against it. I wondered if passing out on the bench to recover was a bad idea but luckily I never quite blanked out. During this agonizing period I consulted Dr. Google to understand why my body was reacting in such a way and Eureka! I had an answer. I had always thought heat related ailments were what did me in but today was mild by South Florida standards and I had plenty of cold water. Turns out the reason for my malfunction was my digestive system. I always wait an hour before training after a meal but my body is telling me I need longer.
Its quite the revelation as now I know why this has happened and more importantly I can continue on my quest. I’m sure mom is reading this having been tempted to call and make sure I’m ok and to say how crazy I am for working too hard but this is life. Life is hard and when it gets tough folding is not what you do, persisting is. As I lay on that bench all I could think about was finishing the workout and getting that 500 and sure enough once I felt better I walked over to the shop where my bicycle was being serviced, pedaled home and resumed the workout.
OK so I only got 400 of the 500 the workout calls for but you better believe next week I’ll be right back on the horse in pursuit of my 500 goal the way I chased down my million. While a Monday where you almost pass out and are doubled over in nausea usually wouldn’t quantify as a great day I learned a lot about myself physiologically and spiritually. When I look at footage like the type in that workout link I get excited and can’t wait to be up on the bars doing it myself. With every setback I become more and more determined because I know I can do it. “Never let weakness convince you that you lack strength.” It’s a quote I saw written on the wall at LA Fitness and for a moment I thought sheesh I’m old and falling apart but now I know I have what it takes. It’s not about being strong its about working hard and being consistent. I don’t need talent or a gifted physique I’m obsessed cheers.